July 21, 2017 • BY Laurie Joy

Why Bad Moms are Giving Good Moms a Bad Name

Just Hear Me Out on This One…

I’m not sure what rock I’ve been living under, but I JUST saw this movie this past week. We were on a family road trip, arriving late at night to our hotel, and while my son slept in the back seat with me, I put in the movie, Bad Moms.

Now don’t get me wrong, the movie Bad Moms is funny and I know it was a BIG hit with moms everywhere.

I had some genuine laugh out loud moments while watching it! But the premise of the entire movie is sad, to me, anyways. That good moms, have to be bad moms, to be good…it’s messed up but it’s true.

Here we have a mom, who is overworked, stressed, always in a rush, married to a man who doesn’t appreciate her, kids who talk back to her, etc.

This movie is popular because it’s relatable for most moms out there. Most moms can see themselves in Mila Kunis’ everyday actions.

They see themselves in the running around, the making of the lunches, the PTA meetings, the trying to do everything for everyone and the thankless job of being a mom. Hey, I’ve been there too!

But, when I totally lost myself in the shit storm of my life, I began to do something about getting my mama mojo back.

Now, mind you, I didn’t have to ditch my husband, or punch the PTA President in the tits, ha, but I did have to make some changes.

I don’t think all moms have to be the pain in the ass (PITA) mom who runs the PTA meetings…what a total be-otch.

But there was something to be said about her. A mom who outwardly shows that she has it all together, her hair is always done, her makeup impeccable, her closet full of  wonderful outfits, but what is underneath all that Facebook Façade (as I call it) is a mom who is really struggling as well.

A mom who doesn’t have love in her relationship with her husband, and kids who don’t respect her. I’m convinced that ALL moms have a shit show, it’s just to varying degrees. Some have a real mess and some have a mild one.

So, What Do You Consider a Bad Mom:  

  • a mom who isn’t at home with her kids,
  • too busy with work to pay attention to them,
  • buys their love instead of spends time with them,
  • doesn’t attend their games or practices,
  • doesn’t always have a homemade meal on the table,
  • a mom who is smoking crack on the back porch?

What is that for you?

Interestingly enough, Mila Kunis decides that she is going to be a “bad mom” that her life begins to take a turn for the better.

  • She tells her teenage kids to make their own breakfast! #hallelujah
  • She tells her son she isn’t doing his projects anymore! #fuckyes
  • She kicks her cheating husband to the curb! #dontletthedoorhityourass
  • She tells her boss exactly what and when she wants to work! #gosister

To me, that’s the definition of a good mom, a FUCKING great one in fact.

If we can’t let our kids have a little responsibility and freedom then what are we raising? Overly dependent, entitled, expectant, brats?

Yup. I would say so.

I don’t think moms everywhere have to be there 24/7 for our children. I think that if we show them that we take time out for ourselves to feed our passions and purpose then we are in turn teaching them to do the same.  So skipping a game or practice here and there is okay.

Rid yourself of mom guilt ASAP!

Because if you don’t take time for yourself, your children also see that and then in turn learn that they too must give to everyone all the time, and that’s not what we want our children to learn and practice.

Balance is for everyone involved. For moms. For our kids. For our partners.  But balance is what needs to be practiced, every day, for our sanity as a mom.

How the hell do you expect to be a good mom when you never have time for yourself?

Many moms are just trying to get by, doing their best, with what they have on a daily basis. And where we all can learn and improve (to some extent) we are fucking awesome, nonetheless!

We cook, clean, coddle, cajole, sympathize, love, discipline, organize, volunteer, work, run households, balance cheque books, run businesses, and so on and so on.

And therefore we NEED to take care of ourselves and our mental health, our physical health, our soul, the people we hang out with, the passions that we need to revisit, and so on.

Because we as moms have the most awesome responsibility of raising our beautiful children and we need to care for ourselves.

For more information how I take care of Mamas every summer, check out The Mojo Mama Meet-Up happening this summer for moms everywhere!

One weekend can transform your life! Click here for more info!

My Question to You Is:

I don’t have a question this week. I want you to know that today and always you are the best mom you can be! Love and forgive yourself more often.

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